The VOICE. The noise we may often hear in our minds, reminding us of everything we fear we’re not as women and mothers. That irrational voice, often comparing us to a number or a romanticized version of something we often think we should be, but instead of coming from a place of authenticity and courage, it speaks from a place of fear.
We all have it. It’s innate and a direct reflection of the insecurity and fragility we feel as human beings and mothers. Some of us have a louder voice than others, possibly because some of us have lived through moments in our past when this voice was the sounding board of everything we couldn’t control.
I know from my own personal experience, that my voice comes from childhood trauma…the kind of trauma that develops when you’re forced to grow up too soon. My voice was a product of divorced parents, emotionally unstable parents and a childhood lost at the young age of 9. I became aware that although my voice will often be the antagonist to my goals and dreams, it’s familiar and because of that, I will sometimes allow it to speak.
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What happens when we make room for our inner critic…
As long as we made room for this voice, it became louder over the years. It showed up regardless of how much or little courage we had, and comforted us when we decided not to pursue the things it screamed the loudest about.
It has been familiar, yet awkward and annoying…like an old friend that has overstayed their welcome and won’t leave because it’s time for you to move on. It becomes harder and harder to have the strength and courage to tell it you’d like to move on, but you know it’s essential because the relationship hasn’t served you well.
Many of us never have the courage to say goodbye to this voice because it’s like cutting off a family member, surrendering to the idea that what you once valued and were connected to, serves you no purpose because it’s toxic. You fear that if you let it go, you’ll end up having it resurface and say, “I told you so” when you try to pursue something and fail.
To quiet this voice, requires a complete surrender to the unknown. This scares you. Deep down, you know it is critical to tear down the walls that once protected you. You must risk getting hurt, wounded and ultimately fail but learn to pick yourself back up again.
This all seems so incredibly overwhelming as a mother, that you don’t want to even face the freedom and growth this process would allow you to embrace. You know it’s a risk you must take but the work involved keeps you from pursuing it. You are currently in a state of limbo with yourself and it’s exhausting.
As you continue to hide behind this voice, there’s still a part of you looking to break free. Without being consciously aware of it at times, you are looking for a sign…something to tell you “It’s TIME”…time to let go and be the woman and Mother you know you can be, for yourself and for your children. Well, here’s your sign.
You’ve read this far, and have already faced the thoughts in your head and the guilt associated with them, for not breaking free of this voice earlier in your life. You’re at the fork in the road. “It’s TIME” to take a different path.
You know this road won’t be easy, but you owe it to yourself to be the best version of who you can be. You don’t want to live a life of regret, not being able to pursue the goals that have been silenced, deep down in your soul for years.
There’s a fire within you, that when stoked, you know has what it takes to provide the energy you need to conquer this voice. You know this voice won’t go away or be completely silenced, but through your self love and prioritizing your hopes and dreams above it, you’ll quiet its noise by setting your boundaries.
You won’t allow this voice to dictate your life outcomes, and when you put efforts towards your goals, you’ll prove to this voice that YOU are in control of your destiny, not your fears.
Although many would be able to justify your hesitation to change, you are tired of living the hypocrisy of telling your children to live out their dreams when you aren’t living out yours. You know deep down, that your change will teach them the greatest lessons they will learn about self love. Your actions will serve as pivotal points to their confidence and willingness to live out their dreams because you showed them what’s possible when you do.
You won’t allow this voice to dictate your life outcomes, and when you put efforts towards your goals, you’ll prove to this voice that YOU are in control of your destiny, not your fears.
Just like a nurturing figure would empower a child to confront their fears, we too can learn to silence our inner critic and embrace our potential. Recognizing that the voice of self-doubt is often a product of past experiences or external influences can be the first step towards reclaiming our confidence.
We know that this voice is something that can be silenced as we grow in our self-advocacy and resilience. We know that if we decide to confront this voice, we can ultimately reach our potential. This idea is exciting! We are still afraid, but our soul is calling us to make a change and we are ready to answer.
Your greatest life achievements are waiting just around the corner! Embracing change and letting go of negative self-talk can open up a world of possibilities. When we choose to say goodbye to that unhelpful voice inside our head, we create space for amazing opportunities.
Say goodbye to the voice who hasn’t served you well. What achievements are you ready to pursue as you take this bold step forward?
